Don't Mom Alone Podcast

Sissy Goff is one of our favorite counselors to have on the show and she’s back with us to talk about her new guide for helping teen girls with worry and anxiety. But beyond that she offers hope and help for all of us as we experience hard emotions in the midst of this pandemic.

We talk about strategies for working through worry and anxiety for different ages and stages of kids and for us as moms. And Sissy reminds us to trust our instincts when it comes to helping our kids. 

“You are not alone. And as a mom, your gut is your superpower. You are so intuitive and trust your gut on what's going on with your kids and, and have a few people that you trust a lot that you can talk to. Definitely talk about it because anxiety left untreated only gets worse. I'm seeing so much more in the pandemic that it's spilling over into depression.”

She also reminds us that asking for help is a brave and often necessary step for helping our kids learn practical ways to fight back when worries come up.

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Direct download: SissyGoffEp311.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:30am CST

Amber O’Neal describes herself as a homeschooling mama using Charlotte Mason principles in an atmosphere where “Charlotte Mason wears an afro.” She joins me to talk about how she unexpectedly found she loved homeschooling and working to help her kids love themselves and others.

“The Holy Spirit is the supreme educator and the Holy Spirit will speak directly and work directly with our children just as he does through us. And that was a total reframe for me because it gave me a lot of freedom and released a lot of pressure for me when I realized that I'm actually not the supreme educator, I am a guide and I'm going to come alongside my child and that my job is not to teach in the traditional sense of teaching, but more to act as a guide.”

Amber shares why she’s creating resources for her children and others to share books and history from people of color and the journey she’s been on with her children as she encourages them to embrace their skin color and cultural history.

 

And her resources and the Charlotte Mason principles aren’t just for homeschooling mamas. She has book lists of great things to read with your children to give them a more holistic view on black history, poetry and culture. 

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Direct download: AmberJohnstonEp310.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:30am CST

Harville Hendrix, PhD and his wife Helen Hunt, PhD have been helping couples for years as therapists, authors and speakers. They are on a mission to share the concepts of safe conversations with the world. They join me to share how their method can help us have more effective in-depth conversations with our spouse and children.

This works every time. It works with parents, with children and couples. It is something that we now know scientifically that if you mirror another person back accurately and with warmth and no judgment, something will happen inside of them. Something marvelous.

They model a safe conversation for us and offer a lot of encouragement and hope for couples who are struggling and how “Conflict is future growth waiting to happen.”

Harville and Helen have an amazing offer for DMA listeners. Use code DMA on their site at safeconversations.com to get 50% off your choice of SC Essentials or the Ultimate Couples Bundle, both courses will receive free tickets to a live workshop of your choice, a $196 value.

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Safe Conversations courses: https://safeconversations.com

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Direct download: HarvilleHelenEp309.mp3
Category:marriage -- posted at: 12:30am CST

Our kids begin to feel and respond to shame as early as 15 to 18 months of age. Those early moments can begin a lifelong struggle with feeling unworthy, inadequate and unlovable. Shame also disintegrates us (separating our thinking brain from our feeling brain) and isolates us from others. 

My guest is Dr. Curt Thompson, a psychiatrist and expert on the effects of shame and how to find freedom from the lifelong negative messages that come after us and our family.

“One of the things that we notice about shame is that because we are immobilized and we are hiding, shame does not actually ever allow us to move toward God. This is why we have to have someone come and find us. This is why when our children are experiencing shame, we have to go and find them. This is why it's important for us as parents to have others who are coming to find us.”

YES! Moms don’t let moms sit in shame. We can choose to seek out others when they are stuck in the shame cycle. Who are your 2 or 3 moms that will help you tell your story more truly? 

Dr. Thompson walks us through some practical ways to build in memories and physical reminders to work against shame in the future for both ourselves and others. And throughout our conversation he points back to how God doesn’t leave us to deal with shame alone.

“The beautiful thing is Jesus isn’t worried about our kids. He's not worried about your mothering. He's delighted. He knows how hard this work is and he knows that we will do it imperfectly. Even when we have our worst moments in which we foist to shame upon our kids or when our kids experience shame against everything that we're doing to try to combat it, God is saying: ‘I'm not worried. I never run out of options.’”

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Direct download: CurtThompsonEp308Final.mp3
Category:healing -- posted at: 12:30am CST

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